Mini Mini Reviews #2

“The Omega Man” (1971) – More or less, it’s a lame version of “The Last Man on Earth,” that exchanges all of its subtlety and tension for over the top goofiness and really poor effects. Grade: D+

“Moonstruck” (1987) – A very heartwarming romance with one of the more honest performances out of Nicholas Cage, while also proving how multi-talented Cher can be. Grade: B

“Cleopatra” (1963) – This should be the dictionary definition of extravagant and box office failure. The history behind “Cleopatra” is far more interesting than the movie itself, though that might be due to the four-and-a-half hour runtime. I wouldn’t have nearly as much problems with the film if it wasn’t the longest film I’ve ever watched and nothing about the film justifies that runtime. Grade: C

“The Death of Stalin” (2017) – A nice palette cleanser after “Cleopatra,” “The Death of Stalin” feels like the Russian equivalent of “Dr. Strangelove” focusing on incompetent idiots having to deal with problems they were never prepared for. Great dialogue, wonderful performances, and a hilarious pace that never lets up. Grade: B+

“Cornered” (1945) – A man travels to Argentina to find the Nazi who killed his wife, and the film utlimately becomes more about stopping that same Nazi from controlling some crime syndicate or something. It started out great and Dick Powell’s performance really captures the grief and pain he’s going through, but somewhere along the way the film loses its focus. Grade: C+

“Scoob!” (2020) – One of the best children’s movies in the last year, “Scoob!” is colorful, funny, loyal to the source material, and most importantly, fun. It takes Scooby-Doo to a more personal level than he’s ever been while still having a great sense of humor about it all. The opening is touching and the ensuing sequence where they remake one of the classic Scooby-Doo moments is great to see. Even though it’s aimed for little kids, there’s enough here for older fans of Scooby to enjoy this movie. Grade: B

“A Ghost Story” (2017) – Is it cliche to call this film haunting? One benefit I’ll give “A Ghost Story” is that, in the case of other thought-provoking indie films like “Under the Skin” I’d normally be bored out of my mind with so little happening in the film and even less pontificating. And while there are some annoyingly slow or nonsensical moments in “A Ghost Story,” the film really does drive home how distant, cold and worrisome death can be. It certainly has some bizarre artistic choices, but those choices do lead to a point that makes the whole piece worth it. Grade: C+

“Candyman” (1992) – This is a supernatural horror film way ahead of its time. Much like “The Twilight Zone,” “Candyman” uses myths and legends to talk about issues that plague society, and especially societies that often get unheard, especially in the 1990s. Wonderful writing, spectacular performances, some impressive cinematography, and horrifying effects, this one shows why the myth of Candyman has stuck with us for so long. Grade: A-

“I am a Fugitive from a Chain Gang” (1932) – For 1932, this film is as politically charged and controversial as Hollywood could be, taking a long, hard look at the dehumanization of the criminal justice system and how it defines those who have been in it. This film is brutally honest and horrifying for its time, but surprisingly thrilling, especially due to Paul Muni’s gripping performance as a man caught up in the mechanisms of a corrupt and petty form of justice, and how that changes him from the inside out. Grade: A+

“Horse Feathers” (1932) – Not the best Marx brothers comedy, but this one is certainly worth watching if only for the climatic football game where the brothers go all out. At times, it feels like a cartoon in how energetic and absurd they get. Grade: C+

“Gattaca” (1997) – A thought-provoking piece of speculative fiction, “Gattaca” explores every aspect of how humanity would change if we went all in on the genetic manipulation, both the good and the bad, especially how that would make the best of us possible but also create a new form of descrimination against those who didn’t have their genetics changed. It’s an effective triumphant story, sold by Ethan Hawke’s emotional performance, with some eye-opening world building. Grade: B+

“The Yearling” (1946) – This is your standard, run-of-the-mill boy and his dog story, except that it’s a baby deer instead of a dog, complete with a coming-of-age story about the boy fighting for his home and growing up a little faster than expected. The best part is certainly the boy’s father, played by Gregory Peck, who has the same likable charm we’ve come to admire from him in works like “To Kill A Mockingbird” and “Roman Holiday.” Grade: C

“Murder by Contract” (1958) – This is a barebones film noir about a hitman with a strict code that he adheres to, with a strange sense of superiority that gives him a rather cool edge. Aside from a memorable soundtrack and the coolness of the main character, this is your basic film noir. Grade: C+

“Da 5 Bloods” (2020) – Describing “Da 5 Bloods” as a strange mix of “Do the Right Thing,” “Apocalypse Now” and “The Treasure of the Sierra Madre” would not do this film justice. Much like all of Spike Lee’s best work, this film captures a great pain that is timeless in its relevance, in this case the mistreatment of black soldiers during the Vietnam War and how situations have not improved much since then. Most of this is sold through the tortured performance of Delroy Lindo, a man teetering on the edge of clarity and insanity, and a brilliant fusion of Fred C. Dobbs and Colonel Kurtz. It is eye-opening, impactful, thrilling, visually stunning, and it is Spike Lee in his element. Grade: A

“Underworld U.S.A.” (1961) – If “Mildred Pierce” is the perfect Mother’s Day film noir, then “Underworld U.S.A.” is the perfect Father’s Day noir, about how far one man will go to avenge his old man. What really hits home is that, while we never get to see the father alive, we see just how much he impacts our protagonist (Cliff Robertson) in his day-to-day life, making this a tribute to how much a father influences his son’s life in invisible ways. Grade: B

“San Francisco” (1936) – Aside from the spectacularly executed earthquake special effects and model use that followed that scene, nothing too extraordinary about “San Francisco.” Other than wanting to slap Clark Cable for being the most insensitive, smug, selfish prick on the planet, and that apparently D.W. Griffith co-directed it, which would probably explain why the film wants us to sympathize with the most unlikable man on the planet. Grade: C

“Tokyo Godfathers” (2003) – “San Francisco” could have learned a thing or two from this movie about taking characters that should be unlikable or despised and giving them dimensions, trauma and redemption. Everything about this movie flows together so perfectly, especially the broken homeless family healing each other through actions even they didn’t know they had in themselves. Grade: A-

“A Matter of Life and Death” (1946) – The best way I can describe “A Matter of Life and Death” is as a reverse “Wizard of Oz,” where real life is filled with bright technicolor and new opportunities to explore and love, and the fantastical is shot in black-and-white and is shown to be a dreary, monotonous bureaucracy. If you enjoy “Wizard of Oz,” you should definitely give this one a try. Grade: A-

“The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner” (1962) – Certainly the most angsty, rebellious British film I’ve ever seen. It shows a darker, more honest look at the impoverished side of Britain and the hardships that those people carry. Grade: C+

“I was a Male War Bride” (1949) – One of the better examples of a love-hate relationship I’ve seen in Hollywood movies, where both partners (played by Cary Grant and Ann Sheridan) constantly try to one-up each other in the most showoff-y way possible, which gets on the other’s nerves, while always going out of their way to help the other whenever possible. It is odd that the titular plot of the film, about Cary Grant having to pose as a war bride, only comes in the last 40 minutes, but this light screwball comedy still works throughout. Grade: B

“Chariots of Fire” (1981) – On the complete opposite end of the spectrum from “Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner,” this film is all about proper Englishmen and devotion to that prim and elegant lifestyle above all else. Still, the most interesting thing about “Chariots of Fire” was the soundtrack, mostly because the electronic 80s music feels so strange when used for a film set in the 1920s. Grade: B-

“Earth vs. the Flying Saucers” (1956) – What pushes this film above other 1950s sci-fi movies is a few things. Ray Harryhausen’s effects work on the flying saucers breathes new life into something we often take for granted now, the final battle on Washington D.C. still holds up surprisingly well, especially when combined with other effects that aren’t stop motion, and the romance between the two leads (Hugh Marlowe and Joan Taylor) is charming and never overbearing, making the two leads some of the more likable protagonists in any 1950s sci-fi movie. Grade: B

“The 7th Voyage of Sinbad” (1958) – Going in, I thought the only thing of note was going to be Ray Harryhausen’s stop-motion effects, but there are a few other stand out things about this epic fantasy. Namely, Bernard Herrmann’s score is as good as any of his music for Hitchcock’s films, atmospheric and adds a new sense of scope to the many monsters Sinbad must defeat. Still, the Harryhausen’s effects steal the show and take on a life of their own, especially with so many different monsters here, such as a two-headed bird, multiple cyclops, a swash-buckling skeleton, and a fire-breathing dragon. Grade: B

“OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies” (2006) – To be a truly great parody, you have to love what you’re parodying. “Cairo, Nest of Spies” might be the best parody since “Airplane!” because it doesn’t just nail the aesthetic, camera techniques, green screen effects and fight choreography of the James Bond movies, but the views and attitudes of the time period too, putting Bond’s gross misogynistic and insensitive views on full display to show just how out of date they are, without having the dimwitted, backwards spy who doesn’t know any better come across as unlikable. This spy parody blows all of the Austin Powers movies out of the water. Grade: A

Mini-Mini Movie Reviews

I picked a weird time to stop reviewing films. Apparently when this website stops publishing, a pandemic begins.

Over the last two months of silence, I’ve taken on some new responsibilities that have kept me away from film reviews, mostly a new job that allows me to work from home. And while I’ve been focusing all of my attention on that job, that didn’t stop me from watching the occasional film, including over 20 films I’d never seen before.

And while I don’t quite have the time to write full length reviews on all of them (including some that I watched over two months ago), I do feel like I should give my thoughts on all of them, even if it’s just one sentence on each. So I’m going to try something new by offering you some mini-mini-reviews. I’ll try not to make this a regular thing, but can’t make any promises.

“Paprika” (2006) – Imagine if “Inception” was animated by Miyazaki and was more of a psychological thriller about making literal dreams into reality, and throw in some anime insanity and you’ve got “Paprika.” Grade: B+

“Falling Down” (1993) – All it takes is one really bad day for some people to snap, and “Falling Down” pushes the envelope of how one man going on a rampage against the society could be any of us, pulled together by an off-the-wall performance from Michael Douglas. Grade: B+

“Crime Wave” (1954) – “What do you want? Christmas every day?” is one of the greatest and most quotable movie lines that no one talks about. Grade: B-

“Red Dragon” (2002) – A much scarier depiction of Hannibal Lecter than “Silence of the Lambs,” while never shying away from what makes him such a likable villain in the first place. Grade: B

“Monkey Business” (1931) – Aside from “Duck Soup,” this might be the best Marx Brothers film, with many memorable slapstick moments and gags that play so well with everyone stuck on a cruise ship. Grade: B



“Sanjuro” (1962) – Not the best Kurosawa film, and certainly a downgrade from its predecessor, “Yojimbo,” but it is serviceable as a lighthearted period piece about rival feudal gangs trying to seize power. Grade: C+

“Address Unknown” (1944) – If the Twilight Zone had been made in the 1940s, I could see the plot of this movie being an episode – how, with the right motivation, anyone could have been convinced to see the same views as the Nazis. Doesn’t work as well today, but at least it was killer cinematography. Grade: B

“Your Name” (2016) – This one gets confusing, going from a lighthearted comedy about supposedly random body swapping to a convoluted tale about time travel and spirituality. Beautifully animated and the characters are quite likable, just don’t think about it too hard. Grade: B

“Beyond a Reasonable Doubt” (1956) – One of the most twist-and-turn filled film noirs I’ve ever seen, this one constantly kept me on my toes, having you love and hate pretty much every single character. Grade: B+

“Lone Wolf and Cub: Sword of Vengeance” (1972) – Far more violent than I ever expected it to be and filled with a lot of odd creative choices that had me scratching my head. Grade: C-

“Night and the City” (1950) – The main character is one of the most detestable, loathsome people I’ve ever seen in a movie, and yet is somehow quite charming in his passion and enthusiasm, so convinced of himself that you can’t help but love him. One of the strangest but most watchable dynamics of any film noir. Grade: B+

“Collateral” (2004) – One of the more effective thrillers in recent memory, with a brilliant cast, a sharp script that hits every moment perfectly with its atmosphere, and never a dull moment. Grade: A

“Exorcist III: Legion” (1990) – The most underrated psychological horror film ever made, “Exorcist III” even surpasses the original “Exorcist” in many ways, with a wonderful crime piece that’ll keep you guessing, pitch perfect atmosphere, scares that are worth it every time and some wonderfully creepy acting from Brad Dourif, who could be the villain in every movie ever and I wouldn’t complain. Grade: A-

“Wicked Woman” (1953) – The most memorable part of this film noir is the opening theme song, performed by a guy who sounds like he’s melting. Grade: C+

“Gentlemen Prefer Blondes” (1953) – One of the best performances from Marilyn Monroe and one that perfectly blends music and comedy, only being outclassed by “Singin’ In the Rain” in that category. Grade: A-

“The Candidate” (1972) – I feel like this one was building up towards its final moments, where the whole picture becomes clear as a farce about people wanting to be politicians for power and fame and nothing else. Other than that, quite forgettable. Grade: C

“Victor/Victoria” (1982) – This one was a lot funnier than I thought it would be, though I should have expected as much when it was made by the same guy who directed “The Great Race.” Lots of great moments for Julie Andrews and Robert Preston. Grade: B

“Superfly” (1972) – “I’m Your Pusherman” is a surprisingly addictive song that this movie loved to death. Grade: B-

“Fallen Angel” (1945) – It makes for a fascinating companion piece with “Beyond a Reasonable Doubt,” as both are about Dana Andrews being convicted with a crime they may or may not have committed, while someone else may be pulling the strings of the crime. Grade: B-

“Dark City” (1998) – Perfectly blends together film noir and science fiction without ever feeling overwhelming, with some wonderful production design of philosophical questions that were better addressed in this movie than they were in “The Matrix.” Grade: B+

“Lone Wolf and Cub: Baby Cart at the River Styx” (1972) – Now this was more like it – still ultraviolent, but puts that violence to good use without ever coming across as grotesque or raunchy. Just a good ol’ samurai facing impossible odds and that’s really all I asked for. Grade: B-

“42nd Street” (1933) – Back when musicals were more of a spectacle than a story, “42nd Street” stands out for its elaborate dance numbers, unique cinematography and fun songs. I can see why this is often regarded as the first really great musical. Grade: C

“7 Faces of Dr. Lao” (1964) – You know, I could get behind the whole mystery comedy aspect of the movie with a mysterious stranger coming to town and using his powers to make everyone’s lives better, but then they had to make almost half of the film a western about land disputes and fighting the old west with newspapers. You know your movie is strange when the western aspects are weirder than one guy playing seven different roles, including Medusa, Pan and a talking clay-mation snake. Grade: C+

“The Crimson Kimono” (1959) – A surprisingly progressive film for its time, setting the tone for the buddy cop genre that would come 30 years later and discuss the trouble that come with interracial couples a decade before “Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner” would do the same thing. Still, it’s more of a police procedural than a film noir with some bold editing and camera techniques that makes this stand out from all the other films during this time period. Grade: B-

Movie Review - "The Hours" (2002)

"The Hours" is a story told throughout multiple generations, detailing how one act of discovery can affect many lives, even ones you’ll never meet. It takes place during three different time periods – one in 1923 England while Virginia Woolfe (Nicole Kidman) struggles with depression and bipolar disorder while writing her novel "Mrs. Dalloway," another in 1951 Los Angeles where pregnant Laura (Julianne Moore) is reading that novel while trying to figure out what she really wants out of life, and finally in 2001 New York with Clarissa Vaughan (Meryl Streep) who has built her life around being like Mrs. Dalloway as she tries to put together a party for her friend (Ed Harris) before he dies of AIDS. All three women desperately try to find meaning in their own lives through this book, regardless of the struggles they all face and the temptation they all feel of taking the easy way out.

And boy is it overly and rather unnecessarily melodramatic.

I admire a network narrative told through three different time periods, something I can only recall being done in 1916’s "Intolerance," but the whole thing does feel forced and exaggerated. The 2001 timeline is especially egregious of this, with Streep’s character basing her entire life on a fictional character and a party. Regardless of what that party means to her or Ed Harris’ character, the whole thing is played out like a life-or-death ordeal with many moments of reflection and regret. All that’s missing is a musical number and every cliche would fall into place. While the acting is wonderful from all three leads, especially Nicole Kidman who really sells just how disturbed she is, the film goes so big on every little moment and treats everything like the end of the world. It really is too much at times, never giving the audience a chance to breathe.
 
Final Grade: C

Top Ten Favorite Films in My Lifetime

Today marks my thirtieth birthday, a day that I've been giving a lot of thought for quite some time. Despite my youth supposedly coming to an end as I make the march towards middle-age, I can't help but feel young. Maybe it's because I live my life without regrets, or because I always do everything in my power to make the most out of each day, but I'm at the point in my life where age is a good thing, like I'm maturing like wine.

But I certainly feel like part of this perspective comes from watching movies and gaining new perspectives on life and myself through a camera lens. Cinema has played a massive role in my life so it's only fitting that I take a look at some of the films that have come along since I've been alive. This works out almost perfectly to encompass three decades of cinema (1990s, 2000s and 2010s). With so many films that have left an indelible impact on me as a person to choose from, I've decided to keep this to just my personal favorite ten that have left the biggest marks on me, the ones that I'll always come back to and remind me of what it was like when I was thirty.

Number Ten - "Adaptation." (2002)

It pains me to admit that I've rarely talked about how brilliant "Adaptation." is on so many different levels and how it perfectly captures the crisis that comes with creativity. The film is a biopic about its own writer, Charlie Kaufman, going through the most difficult experience of his life as he attempts to adapt an unadaptable book and to make a story where there is no story, and the story he creates is him trying desperately to create a story about the book he's trying to adapt. No one could ever attempt something like this besides Kaufman, and it's brought to screen with that same love for passion, uniqueness and originality through the confused and fun performances of Nicholas Cage and Meryl Streep. It is the prime film example of life imitating art imitating life imitating art that still blows my mind just thinking about how everything comes together.

Number Nine - "Goodfellas" (1990)

Gangster films are the ultimate tragedies, with the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. Martin Scorsese has always excelled at making those highs as enthralling and mouth-watering as possible, like being a gangster is the greatest thing in the world, while never detaching itself from reality so far as to sympathize with these criminals so that there ultimate fall hits even harder when they do crash back to our reality. "Goodfellas" is the greatest gangster film of all time because that power is lavishly explored through multiple decades of long takes and loving narration. At times, it almost feels like we're watching aliens with no empathy or understanding of humans other than greed and power, especially Joe Pesci's foul-mouthed trigger-happy gangster that only loves his mother, which only makes the more human moments of realization and betrayal stand out so much more.

Number Eight - "her" (2013)

More than anything else, I adore "her"'s depiction of the future. Sterile, but imaginative. It is distant enough from our own world to wonder how we got here, while still innovative enough to create a fun world with endless possibilities. In a time where every depiction of the future is grim and desolate, "her" is a shining example of how A.I. can be just as witty and passionate as us. It is comforting without every losing its joy for life, showing our evolution as a charismatic love to learn more about ourselves, captured perfectly through the love between a man and an A.I.

Nubmer Seven - "Shin Godzilla" (2016)

I couldn't help myself, this is everything I wanted in a modern-age Godzilla movie. The monster is not only terrifying, imposing and captured in the best possible light, but the worlds' governments react with the chaos and confusion that would come with a giant monster rising from the ocean. It is both parts political thriller and kaiju film, bolstered even further with its sense of national identity so that it's not just a few stuffy politicians reacting to Godzilla, but all of Japan. Even if it didn't have loads of call backs to the Showa series through its music and sound effects, "Shin Godzilla" would still be the best monster movie in the last decade because of its love of monsters and the modern bureaucratic response to such an abomination of life.

 

Number Six - "The Lego Movie" (2014)

Who would have thought a brand-name movie about yellow bricks would hit me this hard? I can't think of another movie that makes me feel like a kid again quite like "The Lego Movie." It is one of the most creative, witty and bizarre movies I've ever seen, but then again you have to be to have your main characters be Batman, a pirate, an astronaut and a cat-unicorn-hybrid while fighting Will Ferrell. Just thinking about how everything unfolds so perfectly makes me giddy, while the comedy still makes me laugh to this day. Everything about this movie still feels fresh, certainly helped by the unique look and design that makes "The Lego Movie" timeless and forever relevant, especially with that twist ending.

Number Five - "Nightcrawler" (2014)

As time has passed, I've fallen in love with the brutal honest of "Nightcrawler"'s depiction of success. Where "Adaptation." was hopeful and passionate, "Nightcrawler" is desensitized to the American Dream, where success only comes to those who want it hard enough, especially in an endangered profession that is journalism. The film is often disturbing, but always rings true to its message of how "Man Bites Dog" is a far more alluring headline than "Dog bites Man." Jake Gyllenhaal has never been as commanding or sinister as he was in "Nightcrawler," always coming across as a man who'd do whatever it takes to succeed in a world that does not care for him.

Number Four - "Ed Wood" (1994)

On the opposite end of the spectrum from "Nightcrawler," we have "Ed Wood," the greatest film about filmmaking. There's a contagious love for life and movies throughout, all perfectly captured in Johnny Depp's charismatic performance as Edward D. Wood Jr., a man so blinded by the spectacle of cinema that he thought it (and he) could do no wrong. Yet beyond a love for movies, there's a genuine optimism that permeates through Depp and Martin Landau's role, both making the most of the time and opportunities they have, a passion that all artists can truly appreciate. It speaks to me, not just as a love letter to one of the best worst filmmakers of all time, but also of how to face the challenges that come with any passion - with an open-mind and a kind heart.

Number Three - "Fargo" (1996)

If I could have, these last three films would all be tied for first place. They are not just perfect movies, but timeless classics with characters that have helped shape my own personality. Take for example, Marge Gunderson from "Fargo," the contemplative, curious, feisty cop who will stop at nothing to make a better world for her child, even if it means copious amounts of fast food and a cute Minnesotan accent. The framing of Marge within the world of "Fargo," filled with greedy, ugly, weak men clawing for something they can call their own and watching them fail due to their own incompetence, makes Marge and her husband sharing little moments of love and affection the most heart-warming and uplifting experience in the last twenty years. The balance of dark comedy, authentic Minnesota charm and Marge's determination despite everything going against her makes "Fargo" not only the Coen brothers' best film, but one of the best films of the last few decades.

Number Two - "The Shape of Water" (2017)

When I think of fantasy, "The Shape of Water" is now the first thing that comes to mind. It is filled with wonder and awe, without ever losing an ounce of humanity, taking the good people with the bad people. It makes the more fantastical moments far more breath-taking, and the moments of quiet realization and love so much more touching, while the angry outbursts of men losing control over something they never had so much more satisfying. It certainly helps that this film boasts the best performance of the decade with Sally Hawkins giving the most raw, passion performance without hardly uttering a word. Guillermo del Toro's sympathetic re-imagining of "The Creature from the Black Lagoon," has a tremendous love for the beauty of life that is hard not to love every affection moment of this wonderful fantasy.

Number One - "WALL-E" (2008)

"WALL-E" is one of the best examples of science fiction, a quiet, contemplative look at where mankind's over-reliance on our tools would eventually take us and how much our own tools would start to mimic us. Some will see this as Pixar's cute take on sci-fi, but I see it as their masterpiece, a visually breath-taking film with a joy for life, all while the silence is even more powerful than words could ever be. Not a single moment is wasted in "WALL-E," whether its exploring a world filled with trash as a single robot tries to find meaning to it all, creating a wonderful companionship between its two robot leads that becomes (oddly enough) the emotional core of the film, showcasing the vast beauty of the universe, or building off the themes of "2001: A Space Odyssey" in the most touching way. I love everything about this movie, and it only gets better every time I watch it.

Movie Review - "Panic Room" (2002)

Leave it to David Fincher to turn a forgettable story of a mother and daughter hiding from home invaders in their own panic room into a compelling, nail-biter that feels remincisent of Hitchcock thrillers like "Rear Window" and "Lifeboat." Every moment is dripping with tension as each group of characters tries to outsmart the other, the mother and daughter trying to get word to the outside world, while the invaders straddle the line between sympathetic and insanely greedy as they try to reason with the mother without blowing up in her face.

Forest Whitaker and Jared Leto play two of the invaders and the chemistry between the two is chaotic but thoroughly amusing, especially the witty banter from Leto and the stone-faced reactions from their third partner (Dwight Yoakam). Jodie Foster plays the fierce but vulnerable mother and she sells every moment of panic and distress for her daughter (Kirsten Stewart). Nothing too special, just an effective and well-put together thriller that feels like Fincher doing his best Hitchcock impression.

Final Grade: B+ 

Movie Review - "Hellboy" (2004)

Even in adapted works, Guillermo del Toro's definitive gothic-horror style shines through in all of his work. I'm honestly surprised it took me this long to watch "Hellboy," because it is the kind of dark alternative superhero film I would have loved even when the only thing I watched were Godzilla movies. "Hellboy" is oozing with creepy details and even more disturbing characters that want to bring about even worse evils than Nazis, all while having that authentic del Toro style of makeup and set design that always sends chills up my spine. My only complaints involve some of the superfluous characters, such as the FBI agent trying to befriend Hellboy (Ron Pearlman), and some plot points that don't go fully explored, such as the relationship between Hellboy and his adopted father (John Hurt). I think this film could have been a little more developed and polished, but for an early 2000s supernatural superhero film, this is far from bad.

Final Grade: B

Movie Review - "Watchmen" (2009)

While some while deem "Watchmen" as an important superhero film, mostly due to its alternate take on American history and being the dark, neo-noir answer to Marvel movies, I see it as the catalyst that began Zack Snyder down his path of bloated, unnecessarily dark superhero movies that is still effecting the DC movies to this day. Based off of the legendary graphic novel, some even saying it is the "Citizen Kane" of comic books, "Watchmen" was seen as unfilmable for nearly 30 years until Snyder brought it to life, but put his fingerprints all over it in the process. Snyder's product is a moody, bleak picture that practically hates superheroes and goes into graphic detail about the violence they cause. "Watchmen" pulls this off much better than Snyder's later films, due to this brutal take on alternate America, but that doesn't stop this film from coming across as arrogant and brutish. While this isn't for the typical movie-goer, it should be praised for its "Forrest Gump"-like soundtrack, capturing the essence of America with its perfect music.

Final Grade: B-

Marvel Cinematic Universe: From Worst to Best

I think it's safe to say that no one has had quite an impact on the film industry at the moment like Marvel studios. Since 2008, they've now released twenty movies in their shared universe, typically releasing three movies every year, with each film building off the the events of the last to make a shared cinematic universe that everyone is trying to copy now. They're films are some of the highest grossing movies of all time, and they're single-handedly keeping superheroes as the most popular genre at the moment.

Everyone has seen their movies and eagerly wait for their next entries to see where they'll take their dramatic, funny and always entertaining movies next. So now that Marvel studios has released exactly twenty of their own movies, I feel now is a good time to look back and countdown all of them from their worst to their best.

Keep in mind that I'll only be looking at the entries in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, not every movie Marvel had a part in. Which means no X-Men movies, Spider-Man movies with Tobey Maguire or Andrew Garfield, and unfortunately no Deadpool films. With that said, these are how I would rank all of the MCU movies.

Number 20 - "Iron Man 2"

As a direct sequel to the first film in this cinematic universe, "Iron Man 2" takes everything that made the first film likable and charming and makes it obnoxious. This film is loud, irritating, makes the least amount of sense of any Marvel film and has the worst pacing of any film in this series. It doesn't really have a lot going for it, especially when the lasting image of this film are the annoying conversations between Downey Jr. and Paltrow talking over each other. Easily the worst film in the series.

Number 19 - "Thor: The Dark World"

Not as annoying or irritating as "Iron Man 2," but this films' crime is that it's so boring. The characters are dull, the plot is forgettable, the way it uses the other nine realms of Asgard is lame, and it feels like nothing is accomplished. The only saving grace of this film is Tom Hiddleston's always great performance as Loki and how he's given a chance to do way more than he did in "Thor." Speaking of which...

Number 18 - "Thor"

Like "The Dark World," this one is just forgettable. It is better due to the heroic character arc of its lead, and many of the scenes with Thor learning to live on Earth are funny in that "fish out of water" style. Beyond that, there is nothing worthy to be seen in "Thor."

Number 17 - "The Incredible Hulk"

This one now feels like the black sheep of the cinematic universe and is often forgotten among the many other super heroes. It also didn't help that Ang Lee's "Hulk" was always on people's minds and that Edward Norton didn't want to keep playing the Hulk after this movie. For the time, this film had great special effects and it made good use of the Hulk's size and scope. But there was really nothing else going for it.

Number 16 - "Doctor Strange"

In the grand scheme of this universe, "Doctor Strange" doesn't really have much going for it outside of its stunning visuals and the odd journey its title character goes through. It is impressive at times, but other moments are just so bland and predictable that it makes for an average blockbuster.

When the best character in your film is a piece of clothe, you know you goofed on a few things.

Number 15 - "Iron Man 3"

Some people really hate this one because of how it mistreats the comic origins of its villain. I always overlook that and instead remember "Iron Man 3" for making me laugh so hard. For a long time, it had the best sense of humor of any Marvel film and loving most of the film as a result - it basically sent the standard for how comedy in Marvel would be handled in the future. But beyond this, the plot is nonsensical and full of holes, and the climax leaves a lot to be desired. Not the strongest Iron Man tale, but far from the worst.

Number 14 - "Ant-Man"

Now we've reached that films that are just...fine. Perfectly serviceable summer blockbusters that were a lot of fun while I was watching them, but had no reason to watch them again after my initial viewing. "Ant-Man" did everything right, especially in scale and storytelling, but didn't leave much of an impact on me. The film did it's job and gave us a unique superhero with a very similar personality to many of the other Marvel leads. It wouldn't be until his next film that we would get a better taste of his personality.

Number 13 - "Avengers: Age of Ultron"

The best way I can describe "Age of Ultron" is that it is a sequel to an experience. Rather than being it's own thing, it tries to replicate something that cannot be topped and captured again. Even though "Age of Ultron" is, in many ways, an improvement over "The Avengers" in terms of storytelling, tension, dialogue and character dynamics, everything it does tries to be "The Avengers" all over again. It just doesn't feel as genuine this time around.

Number 12 - "Captain America: The First Avenger"

Now we move onto the ones that I thoroughly enjoy, starting with quite possibly the best superhero origin tale. Right from the beginning, our lead shows us his charm, compassion and likability that would become his defining characteristics, with some of the best scenes being little moments to prove that he's not trying to be a great soldier, but a good man. This whole movie is like if Captain America made a movie, cutting out the nitty-gritty and leaving only that which the filmmakers feel is important. Certainly one of the more underrated Marvel films.

Number 11 - "Ant-Man and the Wasp"

We come to the most recent Marvel film, one that won me over with its charm and likability. I appreciate the smaller-scale character driven piece, especially since it was a palette cleanser after "Infinity War." I ended up loving every character in this film, which is a testament to the writing and acting throughout.

Number 10 - "Iron Man"

For a long time, this was my favorite. It was the one to start it all and introduced us to Robert Downey Jr.'s unparalleled acting abilities. But then time passed and we got better made superhero movies. Tales that had better character arcs, and much better climaxes. It showed that "Iron Man," while still a solid entry in the shared universe with great acting and writing, is weaker compared to films will see later on this countdown.

Number 9 - "Spider-Man: Homecoming"

The most realistic and authentic of the Marvel films, "Homecoming" was more of a treat than I initially gave it credit for. The comedy felt genuine, the dialogue was fresh and witty without being over-the-top, and Tom Holland plays the best Spider-Man to date, perfectly balancing the line between the comedy and drama of being Spider-Man while still learning how to be the best hero possible. It is as refreshing and honest as we've gotten from Marvel.

Number 8 - "Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2"

While I initially thought of this one as little more than a funny summer blockbuster that was another sequel to an experience, I thought more about "Guardians Vol. 2" and how it blurred the line between really funny scenes throughout with very intense and emotional moments. This thread is forever connected because of the theme of family and how each character has a different interpretation of it. This is far more than a funny summer blockbuster and it deserves all the credit it gets.

Number 7 - "Black Panther"

I know this one is special for a lot of people, and for very good reason. It is a game-changer in terms of what it is saying and what it represents, while still remaining as thought-provoking as a superhero film can get. For me, watching "Black Panther" was like a gateway to vast and diverse culture that I wanted to see even more of. I respect this film for what it accomplished and what it was trying to say, while still being a whole lot of fun.

Number 6 - "Thor: Ragnarok"

Speaking of fun, here is the most balls-to-the-wall insane entertainment of any Marvel movie. It is uproarious, thrilling, charming and so crazy that it's hard not to crack a smile just thinking about it. The whole film never takes itself too seriously, unlike the previous Thor films, and just has as much fun with Asgard as it possibly can, leading to some of the coolest sequences of any superhero movie.

Number 5 - "Avengers: Infinity War"

The most ambitious and epic movie out of this universe. Everything about this film felt big without sacrificing the smaller character driven moments. The pacing is stellar and everything about it felt satisfying while keeping the fun-loving Marvel style. This film is what ten years of development leads to, and it did not disappoint.

Number 4 - "The Avengers"

When I think of Marvel movies and what they're capable of doing, "The Avengers" is typically the first thing that comes to mind. It was an event when it came out and felt like more than just a normal film-going experience. No body have ever made a movie quite like "The Avengers" at the time, and it still hasn't been topped by anyone except by Marvel. This has become the standard for summer blockbusters now with it walks that tight rope between tense character-driven drama and witty comedy. It may seem small now compared to "Civil War" and "Infinity War," but "The Avengers" is still just as mind-blowing today as was in 2012.

Number 3 - "Captain America: The Winter Soldier"

Now we get the truly great Marvel movies, the ones that transcend being just summer blockbusters. I wish I could say all three of these last ones are a tie for number one, but instead I'll place "The Winter Soldier" here because it not only works as a wonderful political thriller, with some of the best action sequences in the entire cinematic universe, especially the highway fight scene, but because of struggle to find the difference between right and wrong in a world that is constantly evolving. The fact that it's Captain America that undergoes this struggle makes it even more interesting as we watch him personally struggle with his beliefs against the rest of the world. A simple yet highly effective movie.

Number 2 - "Captain America: Civil War"

Now take what "The Winter Soldier" said about the difference between right and wrong in an ever evolving world and add in a personal yet passionate conflict between its leads, and you have the most human portrayal of superheroes I've seen in a long time. It is amazing how well this film works on so many levels and never stops being entertaining for even a moment. The acting, the writing, the pacing and tension is solid throughout, but the relationships are the star of this film, especially with how brutally real they feel. It's one of the few Marvel films that made me think about what these heroes were fighting for and what they were doing to the world at large, all while still being thoroughly entertaining.

Number 1 - "Guardians of the Galaxy"

This may come as a surprise to some, since I wrote off "Guardians of the Galaxy" as little more than a dumb popcorn flick in my initial review. But the more I thought about how different this film is from every other Marvel film, and as they released more superhero tales, the more I looked back on this film and realized how smart, witty, emotional and stunning this film can be. On paper, this film should not work - every one of these characters are assholes, while four of the five main cast members aren't human, one of which can only say three words. Yet through clever writing, unbelievably captivating performances, an unparalleled soundtrack and the best world building of any Marvel film, we get a gem amongst some already awe-inspiring movies.

But the main reason "Guardians of the Galaxy" is my number one is because it was a risk. Marvel had no idea if this film was going to win people over. Unlike their other products with heroes that everyone knows about and could turn a profit even if they made a bad movie, only die-hard comic book fans knew who Star Lord, Rocket and Groot were. Marvel took a huge chance by doing a story that, not only didn't contain any previously established characters, but was filled with characters that were far from heroes. Hell, two of it's characters were a CGI raccoon and living tree! But despite all of the odds, this is the most memorable, fun and heartwarming film that Marvel has ever released.

With Marvel dominating the film industry at the moment, as well as how many companies conduct their business, it's safe to say that their movies aren't going anywhere, especially since "Black Panther" and "Infinity War" are in the top ten highest grossing films of all time while still being critically praised. These films keep finding new ways to tell fascinating and surprisingly complex stories that seem to keep getting better over time. As long as people enjoy people becoming more than what they are, Marvel will always have a special place in our hearts. 

Movie Review - "Gamera: The Brave" (2006)

I didn't think it was possible to hate another daikaiju movie almost as much as I despise "Godzilla: Final Wars," but then along came "Gamera: The Brave," a film so insufferable and insipid that it makes me weep at how bad mid-2000s monster movies were. There is no joy to be found in this film, nor any love for Gamera's past. It doesn't even feel like a monster movie most of the time, just a slow and forgettable Japanese drama that relies way too much on terrible child actors.

I'd rather watch the cheesiest and most obnoxious 1960s Gamera film ten times before I watch "Gamera: The Brave" again. At least those movies are fun in a "so bad, it's good" way, especially when they think traffic safety is as big of a problem in the world as war and pollution. There's a certain charm to those movies, especially with their light-hearted and carefree tone - they're perfect for rainy day monster fun. "Gamera: The Brave" on the other hand, rams its message of children saving the world down our throats to the point that it is poisonous to this film, all while forgetting that the audience is here for Gamera.

The film follows a young boy named Toru (Ryo Tomioka), who lives in a small Japanese village and is mourning the death of his mother. Toru eventually swims out to a nearby island and finds an odd egg, which hatches into a baby turtle that he takes in and names Toto. He falls in love with his pet turtle and shows him to all his friends, especially when Toto starts to fly and grow very fast.

Toru learns from his friend that Toto might be a reincarnation of Gamera, Japan's favorite fire-breathing flying turtle, after Gamera sacrificed himself to stop a flock of murder birds thirty years ago. Toru refuses to believe that his friend is Gamera, because that means he's a monster and apparently monsters always have to sacrifice themselves? Either way, things get more complicated for Toru and Toto when a giant man-eating monster shows up to terrorize their town, forcing the growing turtle to step in.

A big problem with "Gamera: The Brave" is that it is slow and takes far too much time and effort to set up these kids that we have no reason to care about. The film spends about 25 minutes setting up Toru's life in his town with all the passion of a bad after-school special, all of this before introducing the monsters. Even after Toto shows up, it follows the same antics of a kid trying to hide is new pet from his parents, all while Toru shows as little emotion as possible. This goes on for more than half of the runtime before the idea of Gamera is even brought up.

I want to say that "Gamera: The Brave" was trying to replicate the tone of the first Gamera film, which spent a considerable amount of time setting up a little boy and his pet turtle, but even that film gave us some good old-fashion monster action that was interjected throughout that film. For the first half of this movie, it doesn't do anything with its monsters, instead giving us a tepid melodrama that is hindered further by bad pacing and even worse acting.

Even when it does get to the monster scenes, they're just as slow and low energy as the rest of the movie that they come across as uninspired. The movement of the monsters is janky and the color palette ranges from gray to dark brown. This gets even worse when the film tries to shoe-horn in as many children as possible into the finale to preach its cringe worthy message about the power of children and their connection to Gamera.

The filmmakers somehow make their children worse than the 1960s Gamera films, where the kids always seemed to have military clearance and the approval of the Japanese government, by showing they are more powerful and important than any adult in this movie, and doing so in the most over-the-top manner possible. This movie loves kids, but can't understand why they're so great.

I hated "Gamera: The Brave" from start to finish. If it wasn't confusing about it's "monsters always sacrifice themselves" message, it was boring me with its horrendous pacing and acting, all while never embracing its monster heritage. It hurts to see so much potential after the 1990s Gamera trilogy wasted on such a disrespectful movie. There is nothing fun or enjoyable to found here and it is best left forgotten and alone.

Final Grade: F

Movie Review - "The Pianist" (2002)

Making a film about the atrocities of World War II is like walking a tight rope - one false move or overplayed gesture could cause everything to go wrong, but if you play it expertly and with grace then it is a work of art. This is especially true with portraying those affected by the ruthless and beyond barbaric acts of the Nazis. While there's a certain strength to a film that doesn't shy away from the terrible things that happened throughout Europe during that time and that is absolutely something to respect, there does come a point where it is too much and enters the realm of depressing and almost unwatchable.

Take for example films like "Schindler's List" and "Life is Beautiful," both films that put themselves in the thick of the struggle and show every excruciatingly painful and horrifying things the Nazis would do to any one they considered less than superior. But at the center of it all, there's a heart to these films - a reason to life beyond the struggle to survive. The main characters in these films put everything they have on the line so that others will live on, because they realize that people should live and not just survive.

To me, that makes those films watchable. They're not just gruesome tales about those who lived through the war against the Nazis, but morality tales about how the good and kind in men will always outshine and prevail over the evil and darkness. If you take out that moral center and leave only the fight for survival in the face of these monsters, then you're left with "The Pianist," an unbelievably depressing movie that I respect but would never watch again.

The film is based off of the memoirs of Wladyslaw Szpilman, a Polish-Jewish concert pianist at the beginning of WWII. Szpilman (Adrien Brody) lives in Warsaw with his family as the Nazis invade their country and delegate a specific ghetto area of town for the Jewish, as he and his family fight to stay together and survive despite everything the Nazis throw at them, while Szpilman never gives up on being the best pianist he can possibly be.

"The Pianist" is unforgiving, unflinching and honest about the fight Szpilman had to contend with for over six years. Every violent act is given the stunned silence it truly deserves without anything ever losing its weight. But as Szpilman witnesses all these horrible acts and merely does what he can to survive, that tight rope walker starts to overplay his movement and starts to fall off that rope.

Watching a man hopelessly cling to life while it is being extinguished around him is only watchable for so long before it becoming daunting. Watching this for over two and a half hours, like all faith and hope is gone from the world, makes it a bleak and unpleasant experience. Even though Adrien Brody's performance is hauntingly beautiful as he just gets more desperate and ragged over time, the film doesn't give us anything to grab onto. While I don't think that hurts the film, it does hurt the experience.

I would recommend "The Pianist" to those who are curious, but only believe it is worth one viewing. It is a respectful film for its brutal honesty and is worth watching for Adrien Brody's performance, but the onslaught of bloodshed is a massive weight to carry without some form of morality and humanity.

Final Grade: C+

Number 6 - "Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack" (2001)

With this review, we've officially moved into the final category of the Godzilla films - the "Great" ones. From this point on, every movie left in the franchise is not just a great monster movie, but a great film altogether. You do not need to know a lot about Godzilla or giant monsters to appreciate these six remaining films. With that said, let's look at the only worthwhile film in the Millennium series - "Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack."

Yeah I know, extremely long title. From this point on, I'll simply refer to the film as "GMK."

To appreciate GMK fully, here's a quick history of the film's director, Shusuke Kaneko. From a young age, he was passionate about giant monster movies and would end up leading the wave of the next great daikaiju filmmakers. Kaneko is mostly known for revitalizing the Gamera series in the 1990s with a trilogy of serious and good-looking monster films with everyone's favorite giant turtle, with each film being better than the last. This trilogy got the attention of Toho and in 2001, they asked Kaneko to be the director of the next Godzilla film, which he happily accepted.

The unfortunate backstory of GMK is that the final product is much different than Kaneko wanted it to be. In this film, Godzilla fights ancient guardian spirits of Japan, but he wanted the spirit monsters to be Baragon, Anguirus and Varan, since their earthy and more bestial designs worked better for Kaneko's vision. Toho thought the film wouldn't turn a profit if it had monsters the general didn't know, especially odd kaiju like Varan. Instead they replaced the roles of Anguirus and Varan with Mothra and King Ghidorah and removed Baragon from the title.

This has rubbed some Godzilla fans the wrong way, since this means that King Ghidorah, the monster that's always trying to destroy humanity and the planet, is now a guardian monster that fights alongside other kaiju like Mothra. I don't have that big of a problem with it since this happened due to Toho's interference and Godzilla and King Ghidorah are still natural enemies in this movie.

One final thing to understand what GMK wants to say is that it, like the first Godzilla film and "Godzilla vs. Hedorah," is a reflection of its time. In the late 1990s and early 2000s, there was a growing consensus that Japan's youth had little to no respect for their elders, in particular those who fought in World War II. The older generation was becoming worried that the young generation would grow up to resent the sacrifices that were made to keep Japan a live and the past would be easily forgotten.

As such, a lot the dilemmas of GMK revolve around the past coming back to haunt the newest generation. Things that they believed were just "myths" or "legends" turn out to be real. In particular, this Godzilla is different from any other version of the king of monsters. Instead of a symbol of nuclear destruction, this Godzilla is a symbol of anger and resent, possessed by all the souls of those who lost their lives in WWII, and has returned to Japan now because the Japanese people have forgotten about their sacrifices.

The film is set nearly 50 years after the events of the first Godzilla film, with the world enjoying a long peace from giant monsters. But so much time has passed since Godzilla's initial attack that the younger generation thinks he's just a legend, a scary bedtime story you tell your kids. Things change though when an American nuclear submarine is attacked off the coast of Guam and we quickly giant claw marks on the sub, along with glowing blue spines nearby.

Our two main characters are a father and a daughter. The father, Taizo Tachibana (Ryudo Uzaki), is an admiral in the SDF. He lost his parents in Godzilla's first attack on Tokyo, but unlike other protagonists in the Millennium series Taizo doesn't hold a grudge against Godzilla, and instead is just devoted to his work. His daughter, Yuri (Chiharu Niiyama), is a reporter for third-rate digital group that only makes fake reports on supernatural events such as Big Foot and the Loch Ness monster...or in this case, Godzilla. The two butt heads on their vastly different ideologies, but still come across as loving each other when Yuri finds an ancient book about the Guardian Monsters.

After Yuri’s first assignment, she sees a creepy image of an old man in the woods just staring at her. Later that night, some disrespectful punks are driving their motorcycles through the Japanese countryside, terrorizing the locals and vandalizing everything they can get their hands on, including an unsuspecting statue. But while they’re going through a tunnel, it collapses in on itself, killing all of them, though a bystander does briefly see a giant red monster as the tunnel is destroyed. The bystander, in a moment of utter shock, says the monster is Godzilla.
Yuri looks into this matter a bit deeper and finds an ancient book from her closest friend and colleague. The text tells the tale of the three Guardian monsters – Baragon, Mothra and Ghidorah. These are supposedly thousand year old creatures that will be awakened when the world is put in grave danger, sleeping inside of the Earth until they’re called upon. The text says that the Guardian monsters are more interested in protecting the planet, like the forests and mountains, and not necessarily humanity. And seeing how one of them was awoken due to some people’s arrogance, it is possible they see humanity as a threat.
 
This continues as the next guardian monster awakens, when another group of teens rob a gas station up in the mountains, vandalizing the area and breaking the statue sealing Mothra away. As they go out onto the lake to party, they’re thrown into the water and taken under "Jaws"-style by Mothra and killed.

At this point, Yuri becomes convinced that the guardian monsters are real. She tries to tell her father about them, but he remains skeptical, saying the true monster here might be the return of Godzilla, especially after he sees actual footage of Godzilla’s attack on the American sub. The admiral preps the defense forces for a battle against Godzilla, including sending out battleships to track down and find him.

Meanwhile, Yuri meets with the old man she saw earlier in the movie, who now only talks ominously about Godzilla’s return. He says that modern weapons will have no effect on him and that he’ll destroy all of Japan. The old man says Godzilla is filled with the souls of those who died in World War II, including both Japanese and non-Japanese souls. The foreign souls want to avenge their deaths at the hands of the Japanese, while the others wish to punish Japan for their attempts to forget about the wartime atrocities. He finishes by saying the only way Godzilla can be stopped is to awaken all of the guardian monsters.

The idea of this in a Godzilla movie is fascinating to me. Every film the franchise up to this point was typically based on science or technology to create its monsters. Even in its most ridiculous moments, with monsters like Space Godzilla, Biollante, Jet Jaguar and Megalon, you could trace all of their origins logically back to either being abominations of science or creatures older than humans. Suddenly, all of that goes out the window and we’re left with monsters steeped in mysticism and mythology. Godzilla is filled with the souls of the dead, while the guardian monsters are literal legends created to protect the planet.

This makes GMK a one-of-a-kind film because it feels more like a modern-day fantasy instead of a daikaiju film.

After some more strange incidents, including a trip to Japan's infamous "Suicide forest" where Ghidorah is buried underground, two major events occurred nearly simultaneously, as the giant red monster from the tunnel, Baragon, reveals himself to the rest of Japan, and Godzilla rises out of the ocean to terrorize the countryside.

There's something I've felt that was terrifying and off-putting about this Godzilla's design. Maybe its his bubbly spines that look like claws reaching out from hell, or it could be his stance that feels more like a return to the original Godzilla's body movements. But, who am I kidding, it's all about his eyes. Pure white, soulless eyes, as if they've been glazed over with hatred and anger, only adding to his inhuman qualities.

Godzilla is often at his most chilling when the filmmakers change up his eyes. It is true what they say about eyes being the gateway to the soul, and it is especially true with film characters. So when you give Godzilla eyes that don't have any color or pupils, or eyes that are ridiculously small compared to his body, it is just jarring enough that you feel uneasy around those kaiju.
 

 

This leads to one of the nicest looking rampages from Godzilla, as he thrashes his way through a coastal city, destroying an oil refinery with Mt. Fuji in the background and the town's people more confused than upset, since they thought Godzilla was just a legend.

One of the great things about Shusuke Kankeo's monster movies is that they take their time to slowly build up the strength and let everything sink in for a moment. There's a brief scene in this rampage of a woman watching Godzilla walk by her window, shaking with fear because she's convinced she is about to die. But Godzilla simply keeps on walking and everything looks fine, only for his tail to swing back around and destroy the hospital. Little moments like that add so much to the scope of this movie.

We also get a taste of Godzila's atomic breath in this film, which might be his most powerful beam yet. One blast of his signature weapon caused this explosion.

 

Since both Godzilla and Baragon showed up at the same time, the entirety of Japan is confused and ends up calling Baragon the "Red Godzilla."

While this does go a long way to show how out of touch this modern world is with its history of monster attacks, I can't help but feel bad for Baragon. This monster has had a long and sad history. In Japan, Baragon is one of the more popular kaiju, mostly because he looks like a cute giant red dog. But for some reason, Toho hates Baragon. In his first appearance in "Frankenstein Conquers the World," he gets his neck snapped and body thrown off a giant cliff. Then we had "Destroy All Monsters" where he was supposed to attack Paris, but they ended up using the Gorosaurus suit instead. In the first "Godzilla vs. MechaGodzilla," it was supposed to be Baragon that attacked the fake Godzilla but they changed it to Anguirus at the last minute. Baragon was also supposed to be in the title of this movie, but Toho thought it was too long and so they cut him from it, making him a glorified guest star in this film.

Things get even more weird when you factor in the Gamera series, which had a kaiju named Barugon that looked a lot like Baragon. The main difference was that Barugon could shoot rainbows out of his back...yeah, I'm still confused by that. My point is that Baragon keeps getting screwed over even though there's never been any reason to screw him with.

Baragon-rant aside, we quickly learn that Godzilla and Baragon are heading towards each other. They eventually meet up near a mountain-side resort and engage in our first monster fight, which is more-so a beatdown from Godzilla. The only time Baragon gets the upper hand is when he digs around Godzilla's feet and makes him trip. Other than that, Godzilla tosses Baragon around like a rag doll, stomps him into the side of a mountain and flings him around with just his tail.

But another great thing that Kaneko does with his monster fights is incorporating the innocent bystanders and seeing this battle of goliaths from their doomed perspectives. As Godzilla arrives to the fight, he takes out half of a fairly big hill, and we watch as people try desperately to run away, but are crushed either by the massive rocks or under Godzilla's foot. There's a shot of Godzilla throwing Baragon around and we see the red monster flying towards the camera, with bystanders trying to flee but are too late to stop the beast from falling on them.
 

 

The fight ends with Godzilla blasting Baragon with his atomic breath and creating an explosion bigger than the mountain, killing the first guardian monster. But the death of one of them seems to have freed Ghidorah from his thousand-year slumber.

After that, we get some character development for Yuri, as she desperately tries to follow the monsters around to prove her worth to her father. Meanwhile, her father leads the charge against finding a way to deal with Godzilla. After watching Baragon try to stop the giant monster, he's convinced that the guardian monsters are real and that they can and should be trusted. This begins the lead-up to the final confrontation, as Mothra's cocoon appears on top of a lake, and Ghidorah has begun moving underground towards Godzilla.

One thing I've been steadily talking about in this review is the national identity of Japan throughout the film. It starts out pretty poor with the youths that were disrespectful to the locals and surrounding area, but then we get character's like Yuri and her father, hard working people who take pride in what they do. We meet a lot more people during this time, like a friendly bicycle shopkeeper who gives Yuri a bike as he's getting ready to run from Godzilla, as well as Yuri's boss who is as eccentric as he is passionate about supernatural events.

GMK paints a vast and wild picture of Japan, probably even more than "Godzilla vs. Hedorah" did, and I think the movie is better because of that. We see a country that has personality and flaws, making the entire country look like its own character.

As Godzilla makes his way to Yokohama, Yuri's father deploys every available ship, tank and soldier to fight the oncoming threat. At the same time, Mothra hatches from her cocoon in a beautiful display in the moonlight, and flies to join in the fight.

The admiral lays out his plan - The defense force recently created D-3 missiles, explosive war heads with giant drills on them. They're made to burrow into the sides of mountains and then explode, but the admiral is improvising with this. He plans to work in conjunction with the guardian monsters, waiting for them to open up a weak spot in Godzilla's defenses and then use the D-3 missiles to land a fatal blow.

Just as Godzilla arrives in Yokohama, Mothra is right behind him and the two engage in a short fight that once again highlights the slower moments, letting the audience appreciate how majestic Mothra can be sometimes. While this version of Mothra is far more insectoid than usual, it does have a certain charm to it, like I'm watching a beautiful wasp trying to fight a hopeless battle.

Things get a bit better though when Ghidorah shows up. One point worth mentioning is that this version of Ghidorah is more based off the ancient Japanese monster Orochi, an eight-headed dragon that is all powerful. It is said in the myth of the guardian monsters that Ghidorah would rest for three-thousand years to grow all eight heads, but only slept for a thousand years and only had enough time to grow three heads. Again, contributing to the mythological feel of this movie.
 

 

This leads into a great fight sequence between Godzilla and Ghidorah, as the two are relentlessly brutal to each other, with Godzilla nearly ripping off one of Ghidorah's heads. But the most brutal part is yet to come, as after Godzilla knocks both Ghidorah and Mothra away, the defense forces launch everything they have at Godzilla and ultimately accomplish nothing outside of pissing Godzilla off. All that's left for every ground troop is to be disintegrated by Godzilla's fury and rage.

Of all the scenes that involve Godzilla's atomic breath, the shots of him unloading this insanely powerful ray on a defenseless military is one of the more impactful moments, especially when you see bodies of soldiers flying in the background and their screams can be heard echoing from the city.

Godzilla's outburst leaves just one naval ship untouched. Just as he's about to blast it, Godzilla tricks everyone and destroys the weakened Mothra instead, who was trying to sneak up on Godzilla. This leads into the best scene of the movie when all of Mothra's energy transfers into Ghidorah and finally grants him wings, giving him the title of King Ghidorah. The music swells and the whole city is coated in a golden light as King Ghidorah takes to the skies to continue fight Godzilla, even sending his atomic breath back at him, creating a small wound in his shoulder that the admiral has been waiting for.

While Godzilla and King Ghidorah take their battle underwater, we get some final bits of character development between Yuri and her father, as the two talk about their dedications to their jobs and to each other. I admit that these two aren't some of my favorite characters in the Godzilla series, but they are likable and fully developed characters that have grown on me. Certainly the best written characters in the Millennium series.
 

 

From this point, the film goes with a much different ending than one would expect. Yuri and her colleague are blasted out of the bridge they were reporting from, King Ghidorah barely saves them from certain death after getting a power-up that finally grants him the signature gravity bolts, it still isn't enough and Godzilla blasts and kills King Ghidorah, but not before the combined spirits of the guardian monsters force Godzilla down into the ocean to allow the admiral to do something pretty reckless - he flies his small submarine straight into Godzilla's mouth and launches a D-3 missile from inside of Godzilla.

He successfully detonates the missile and blasts a huge hole in Godzilla's shoulder, though it doesn't kill him. As Godzilla tries to blast the helpless Yuri with his atomic breath, he learns that his beam now shoots painfully out of his shoulder wound. So, like a complete idiot, he keeps firing his beam over and over, seemingly forgetting about his wound, until he does it one too many times and blasts himself out of existence.

While Godzilla falling for the same mistake multiple times is a little annoying, I highly enjoy this ending. It is wonderful to see giant monsters and the defense forces working together to bring down an even bigger threat and this is one of the better executed ones, especially with the brave attitude of the admiral.

The film ends with Yuri's father emerging from his submarine and everyone rejoicing, knowing that Godzilla has finally been defeated. The admiral looks off into the ocean and salutes the many lives that had been lost fighting Godzilla, including the lives of the guardian monsters. The final shot pans down into the ocean to show Godzilla's still beating heart and the classic Godzilla theme music plays.

GMK is a different kind of Godzilla movie, but in the best possible way. It keeps the core elements of a daikaiju film while still developing its own identity as a fantasy movie, while painting a fascinating picture of the Japanese people, showing both the good and bad. It continues the tradition of using Godzilla as a means to showcase the problems with Japan throughout the generations, by addressing the fact that the newer generation is ashamed of the older generations sacrifices.

When it wants to be a giant monster movie though, it is stunningly beautiful, with great use of miniatures and practical effects. The film takes its time at just the right moments to showcase its scope and size, while the Godzilla suit remains one of his more terrifying designs. While it is unfortunate that Shusuke Kaneko didn't get to make the movie he wanted with Anguirus and Varan, the final product here is nothing to be ashamed of. This is a wonderful monster movie and one of the best Godzilla films since the end of the Showa series.